I Like The Sin I Do, But Then Feel Guilty, Repent To God, But Fall Again
Question : I struggle with a particular sin that seems to have a stronghold on me. I commit this particular sin because I like it. I know it is wrong but I do it anyway… because I like it. After I commit this sin I feel guilty and remorseful. I repent and ask God to forgive me only to go right back and do it again. It’s as if there are two of me warring against each other. It has become a vicious cycle. Sometimes it seems like I’m fighting a losing battle. I’m so frustrated!
Answer : We know that we all sin many times knowingly by our disobedient actions towards God and unknowingly in our thoughts (Rom 7:19; Psa 19:12; Lev 5:17-19). In Matt. 5:22,28 Jesus said our thoughts can be just as sinful as our actions spiritually. Then in Matt. 12:36, he said that even words that we speak are as serious as the actions we do to be judged for it equally to be justified or condemned by it on the day of judgment. Then the above shows that many sins that which we never even realize as sin we continue in it as though it is not that serious.
Then what can we do in such a state, I believe we can only discern our utter human depravity and ask ourselves, "Who can discern [my] errors?"...[Then ask God's help by saying to Him] "Forgive my hidden faults. Keep your servant also from willful sins; may they not rule over me. Then will I be blameless, innocent of great transgression." (Psalm 19:12-13). In other words, only God could help us overcome our willful sins that we do, and that which also takes a stronghold slowly and subtly in our lives. Only when God steps in to control that part of our lives, we can be blameless, innocent of great transgression and be free from that sin that rules over us.
If sin wasn’t pleasurable we’d have no trouble denying it. For each one of us we have trouble in different sinful areas. For some of us it is as basic as overeating, drinking too much and adoring ourselves with too much external things to be self occupied with it all the time and such...still for some others it is their preoccupation with their bank account, property, sports, leisure activities etc which are many times kept as idols that replace the desire for God...still for some others it is their uncontrollable tempers, or wrong friendship, or lusts [i.e. pornography, masturbation, etc...], or envy, or pride. But all of the above is sinful in the sight of God equally and none can justify one sin as better than the other (James 2:10), even though the soulish, physical, social, financial result or wages of it that we receive as a after effect for committing it in our lives might be different for each of these sins. Only if there is someone living as a hypocrite before God and men as the Pharisees were in the days of Jesus, they could deny they have problems similar to yours (Matt 23:26-28).
Even the mighty apostle Paul had this problem. “For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing.” (Romans 7:18-19). So we must not look to ourselves for the answer for our sin problems, the more we look to ourselves, the more we get entangled in to this sin-confess-sin cycle. But if we choose to thank God for the salvation that He has already given by forgiving our past, present and future sins all at once in Christ Jesus through His death on Calvary (Heb 10:12, 14), and then praise God that He has not only saved us from the penalty of sin but has also has saved us in to a life of peace and joy and righteousness in the Holy Spirit who gives us all of it when we start to desire in our heart to please God by humbling ourselves as incapable of pleasing God by our own strength, but then glorify Him as the only capable person to help us overcome our addiction and weakness towards the allurement of sin through His strength, then God looks towards us and gives His grace to our humble heart to receive and see the victory over sin through Jesus Christ working within us (Rom 14:17; Jam 4:5, 10; 1 Peter 5:5-7; 2 Cor 10:17-18; Rom 7:25).
But nobody on Earth is perfect (1 John 1:8), so when you sin, confess and receive your forgiveness. As Jesus is the present Advocate with the Father who is the only one who is righteous enough to represent us as our substitute and give us relief from the guilt of sin and cleanses our heart from the trace of the remembrance of all unrighteousness through His precious blood (1 John 1:9; 2:1-2), we must approach God always trusting Jesus' favor on us. To God once we confess our sins, He is faithful and just enough to forget it as though it never happened at all (Psa 103:12). We as God's children should also learn to forget our mistakes, sins and failures as though it never happened at all once we have confessed it to God and instead praise God, thank God and love God for who He is and what we have become in Christ Jesus because of His goodness. This will surely break sin-confess-sin cycle to make it become sin-confess-forget and overcome cycle. Once we are not conscious of any sin and its power (Heb 2:15), we will have not fear but only faith towards God and His power to serve Him and glorify Him with a clean conscience in our daily walk with Him (Heb 9:14; 2:14, 16, 18).
Much Blessings.....
Answer : We know that we all sin many times knowingly by our disobedient actions towards God and unknowingly in our thoughts (Rom 7:19; Psa 19:12; Lev 5:17-19). In Matt. 5:22,28 Jesus said our thoughts can be just as sinful as our actions spiritually. Then in Matt. 12:36, he said that even words that we speak are as serious as the actions we do to be judged for it equally to be justified or condemned by it on the day of judgment. Then the above shows that many sins that which we never even realize as sin we continue in it as though it is not that serious.
Then what can we do in such a state, I believe we can only discern our utter human depravity and ask ourselves, "Who can discern [my] errors?"...[Then ask God's help by saying to Him] "Forgive my hidden faults. Keep your servant also from willful sins; may they not rule over me. Then will I be blameless, innocent of great transgression." (Psalm 19:12-13). In other words, only God could help us overcome our willful sins that we do, and that which also takes a stronghold slowly and subtly in our lives. Only when God steps in to control that part of our lives, we can be blameless, innocent of great transgression and be free from that sin that rules over us.
If sin wasn’t pleasurable we’d have no trouble denying it. For each one of us we have trouble in different sinful areas. For some of us it is as basic as overeating, drinking too much and adoring ourselves with too much external things to be self occupied with it all the time and such...still for some others it is their preoccupation with their bank account, property, sports, leisure activities etc which are many times kept as idols that replace the desire for God...still for some others it is their uncontrollable tempers, or wrong friendship, or lusts [i.e. pornography, masturbation, etc...], or envy, or pride. But all of the above is sinful in the sight of God equally and none can justify one sin as better than the other (James 2:10), even though the soulish, physical, social, financial result or wages of it that we receive as a after effect for committing it in our lives might be different for each of these sins. Only if there is someone living as a hypocrite before God and men as the Pharisees were in the days of Jesus, they could deny they have problems similar to yours (Matt 23:26-28).
Even the mighty apostle Paul had this problem. “For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing.” (Romans 7:18-19). So we must not look to ourselves for the answer for our sin problems, the more we look to ourselves, the more we get entangled in to this sin-confess-sin cycle. But if we choose to thank God for the salvation that He has already given by forgiving our past, present and future sins all at once in Christ Jesus through His death on Calvary (Heb 10:12, 14), and then praise God that He has not only saved us from the penalty of sin but has also has saved us in to a life of peace and joy and righteousness in the Holy Spirit who gives us all of it when we start to desire in our heart to please God by humbling ourselves as incapable of pleasing God by our own strength, but then glorify Him as the only capable person to help us overcome our addiction and weakness towards the allurement of sin through His strength, then God looks towards us and gives His grace to our humble heart to receive and see the victory over sin through Jesus Christ working within us (Rom 14:17; Jam 4:5, 10; 1 Peter 5:5-7; 2 Cor 10:17-18; Rom 7:25).
But nobody on Earth is perfect (1 John 1:8), so when you sin, confess and receive your forgiveness. As Jesus is the present Advocate with the Father who is the only one who is righteous enough to represent us as our substitute and give us relief from the guilt of sin and cleanses our heart from the trace of the remembrance of all unrighteousness through His precious blood (1 John 1:9; 2:1-2), we must approach God always trusting Jesus' favor on us. To God once we confess our sins, He is faithful and just enough to forget it as though it never happened at all (Psa 103:12). We as God's children should also learn to forget our mistakes, sins and failures as though it never happened at all once we have confessed it to God and instead praise God, thank God and love God for who He is and what we have become in Christ Jesus because of His goodness. This will surely break sin-confess-sin cycle to make it become sin-confess-forget and overcome cycle. Once we are not conscious of any sin and its power (Heb 2:15), we will have not fear but only faith towards God and His power to serve Him and glorify Him with a clean conscience in our daily walk with Him (Heb 9:14; 2:14, 16, 18).
Much Blessings.....
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