How To Have The Wife Co-operate In Ministry Life?
Prayer Request: Dear Pastor Praise the Lord!
I hope you are fine pastor. Kindly pray for my wife, slowly she is turning back to her old characters, especially, whenever I will get ready to go for ministry outside. Purposefully she is not cooking and if she cooks, she does it only for her and children, and she is speaking very dirty languages, yesterday she phoned her mother at night 11:30 pm and continued her talking up to 12:30 pm. Even her mother and grandmother doesn't have any sense. They will also listen her all stupid things and encouraging her to do more opposite actions against me.
But thanks for praying pastor, God has given me a patience yesterday, I didn't speak anything, today morning also she didn't cook anything, I just dropped my kids to school and I came to office.
Please pray for my wife, some time suddenly she is changing her character for silly matter.
Answer: Greetings in the mighty name of Jesus! Praise the Lord! I am fine by the grace of God! Do not worry, you are in a spiritual war against Satan and his demons in destroying his ideas and bringing people in to the light of heaven. So the best way he can attack you is through attacking the weaker vessel of the other half which is your wife (1 Pet 3:7), so apostle Peter says, "dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs." The moment we recognize that we are dealing with a weaker vessel that breaks often, we can choose positively and wisely to support them in their weakness by covering it up with the grace of God, whenever we do that, the same moment we become heirs together to continue for the Glory of God and the fulfillment of His purpose in the Kingdom of God. Remember, love for others cover multitude of sins, how much you love your wife will depend on how much you are able to cover up her faults (1 Pet 4:8).
Is it easy to forgive again and again their mistake, even for seventy times seven for a day? It is impossible without the grace of God. But God our Savior has promised to give His grace in abundance, so that empowered by it, "we must go through many hardships to enter the kingdom of God." (Acts 14:22). So strength to overcome is not in us, but our sufficiency comes from God whom we hold as a treasure in this earthen vessel of ours (2 Cor 4:7).
So I encourage you to give your burdens day to day to the Lord through prayer and expect not much change from you wife, but rather expect great change of calmness and peace in how you to respond to the weak behavior of your wife which you are dealing day by day (Php 4:6-7; Psa 46:1; Isa 26:3). Yes you are right, the key is not to open our mouth when we know that the arrows of words are sent towards us by the enemy of our soul to make us get irritated and blurt out things which we might later regret, because in anger there comes words of much sin which will give place for the devil to come and disturb the peace within us, and thus through us the whole family as the husband is the head of the home peace keeping atmosphere (Eph 4:26-27; Jam 1:19-20; Prov 29:11; Psa 37:8).
Jesus is our best example to follow in this regard, because God has called us to be conformed to His image (Rom 8:29-30; Eph 4:32), and the path to the glory of God is through walking through the same path of oppression and affliction that Jesus took on the way to the Cross where the Scripture foretold about it saying, "He was wounded for our [which means 'weak humans'] transgressions, He was bruised for our [ (i.e.) 'weak men & women's'] iniquities; the chastisement for our peace was upon Him, and by His stripes we are healed.... He was oppressed and He was afflicted [for us sinful humans], yet He opened not His mouth; He was led as a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before its shearers is silent, so He opened not His mouth." (Isa 53:5,7, emphasis added). In other words, Jesus opened his mouth to defend everyone except himself, by doing so he has allowed God the Father to defend him when he was accused by others through satanic influence and sin nature which operates by pride which God resists. So oppression and affliction are Satanic troubles we face, and God allows it for our own good (Rom 8:28), but when we learn the patience not to open our mouth by the power of the Holy Spirit just like Jesus did, then the glory of God comes directly upon our lives to make us a blessing to many around us (Heb 10:36; 1 Peter 2:21-23; 4:14). At the end of the ordeal God justifies us us and at the same time judges the vessels which were used by the enemy of our soul as instruments to accuse or condemn us for no reason except we walked in the will of God (Rom 15:3; Psa 55:1-23). Commit all your cases to the one who judges righteously. Very soon before other people change or not, your life will be changed in to life of blessedness for the Glory of God! Praise the Lord!
Let go of the faults of the weaker vessel and at the same time when you have to speak forth, ask the Lord for wisdom to speak the right words which ought to be spoken (Jam 1:5), in fact we also see in the life of Jesus that he spoke certain words led by the Spirit but did not open his mouth at other times out of his own desire to defend himself (Mark 14:61-62; 15:2, 34; Luke 23:34; Isa 53:7). We must ask God to help us keep our mouth shut in certain situations, at the same time we must with the help of God speak in certain other situations when we ought to speak the truth with grace (John 1:17), the most important to get from God is to ask Him the wisdom to receive it by faith and to know the difference between the two to understand within us, when to speak and when not to speak. If we have this wisdom from God, in fact we can master everything in this life through the efficient control of our tongue, and it can happen only by depending on the Holy Spirit and His wisdom all the time to pray and swim in the attitude of prayer through praying in the Holy Spirit under our breath all the time (Jam 3:2). This causes our mind and mouth to be controlled by the power of the Holy Spirit.
Having said all of the above, we must understand that we cannot control the behavior of others and that includes our wives and children. A wife is to submit herself to husband voluntarily as to the Lord she respects in her heart (Eph 5:22), and in the same way the husband is instructed to love his wife in the same way the Lord Jesus loved the church selflessly and gave Himself by sacrificing his life for the cause (Eph 5:25). Even the children are to be taught of the Lord ultimately (Isa 54:13), until then we discipline them in the Lord making sure that we do not provoke them to wrath (Eph 6:4). Only the Lord can ultimately bring peace in the heart of our children, or bring submission to our wives by His power and strength, so let go of these things that irritates you in to the hand of the Lord and expect Him to bring a change in them. Even if nothing happens, you continue to walk in the way we have discussed above, because we know, "For our wrestling match is not against persons with physical bodies, but against worldly wicked spirit rulers from various areas and descending orders of authorities which are highly organized from the realm of Satanic kingdom in the heavenly places, which we cannot see with our natural eyes as they are on their mission to influence, dominate and rule this world [in rebellion against the will of God]." (Eph 6:12, Abi's Translation). So we are working against the mission of the Satanic kingdom, so he is supposed to cause unrest to us through the person who is closest to us which is our wife, so let go and let God control your situations in your life and reap the benefit of a prosperous life within first by keeping yourself from being troubled or irritated through the sources which are trying to bring unrest. Then all storms no matter what intensity, it will fall in place very soon by the grace of God.
Especially remember, as a missionary's son, I have seen the devil bring unrest especially after a Sunday, or during a meeting or just before it to discourage the vessel of God through doubt and fear. Specifically on Monday a pastor or the five-fold minister who works for the Lord will usually face a specific battle within their homes, as a minister of God it is good if we could expect these things and wisely could pray for the grace of God and overcome these times of distress within our soul which is satanically induced due to our sin nature which the world calls it 'Monday blues' but I say it is 'satanic unrest'. Do not blame the weaker vessel with old and new character, but rather recognize it as satanic assault against you through your wife and stand in faith to overcome it (Job 2:9-10). As long as we will live on earth, all saints will struggle with the old nature against the new nature, and it is not just your wife but rather every one of us (Gal 5:17). But mostly we do not see our own old nature and are blind to it, or some times we see through the Scriptures like in a mirror but then we forget it soon (Jam 1:23-24), while we can easily see others return to the old nature because our flesh sees everyone as faulty except our-self, this is true for men as well as women (Gen 3:12, 13; Mat 7:3). So men and women of God, God has called us to judge our-self first, and then all the rest around us (1 Cor 11:31-32). In fact, when we are judging our-self, we will have no time to judge others "by what we see with our natural eyes, and will not execute justice by what we hear with our ears" (Isa 11:3), but rather will understand the satanic spiritual realities that operate behind a person, and will judge them with righteousness of the Kingdom of God which is in the Holy Spirit to show mercy to them and in turn we will also receive mercy from the Lord specially for many of our own faults which will keep us intact in the peace of the Lord without unrest, praise the Lord! (Rom 14:17; Matt 5:7; Jam 2:13).
A problem becomes a problem to us, only when we consider it as a problem, but when we choose not to let ourselves be troubled by a problem knowing that even though we may have tribulations, we have peace in Jesus who is within us always, who as our forerunner has already overcome the world on behalf of us, and have told us just to sit in his promises by faith and become overcomers (John 14:1, 27; 16:33; Heb 6:19-20). Abraham as a father of our faith endured suffering patiently, and at the end of it, inherited the promise of God forever and ever which brought more and more blessing and multiplying in his life, and it is the same to us too in our lives (Heb 6:13-18). Praise the Lord!
Praying that all might go well with you, in your family and in your ministry!
You are a overcomer! Say, 'In Jesus mighty name, I AM an OVERCOMER and thus I overcome all things BY the GRACE OF GOD! I am a channel of God's mighty blessings to many now and will become A HUGE BLESSING to a multitude in the days to come! Amen.'
Much Blessings.....
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